Beginning again

This is our week of challenges. Tomorrow, Brian has a full body scan first thing in the morning and an afternoon appointment to get the results. It's all so frightening. They will check his entire body for any traces of cancer cells and then let him know within a few hours what they do or do not find. Luke and I are going with him to the appointment. Thursday, he takes a pill. A radioactive iodine pill. He will isolate himself for days because he is so afraid that he will make someone else sick. He will camp out in the cold because he doesn't want to contaminate our home. He will be alone and I will be afraid.
It has to be the worst time for any man to be alone. He needs us. His friends, his family, his sweet little boy. He needs a distraction, other than the fear of wild animals and creepy-crawlers getting into his sleeping bag. I am afraid that he will return to the place inside his own head that he crawls into and then forgets to live. I don't want him to forget how to be happy and spontaneous and how to laugh. I don't want him to forget himself. I love the way that he is and I want him to be himself.
Don't be afraid. Hold my hand. We can do this together. Don't be afraid. We have walked through worse and we scoffed at the pitfalls and we skipped in the mire. Don't be afraid. I am there with you. Bumps, lumps and ingrown hairs can't phase us. We are stronger than this. Don't be afraid. I am holding your heart inside my heart and I can carry us all the way through.
Don't be afraid. I love you...